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The Elder Dan

@crisperthanthou.bsky.social
249 followers 109 following 1.5K posts

Prefers desktop clients whenever possible. Also at mastodon.social/@crisperthanthou and twitter.com/dcurtisj and www.instagram.com/dancurtisjohnson

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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 14h
I think this is literally the only thing he has learned since the start of his second administration, this one elementary spelling fact.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 22h
I feel like one could maintain an ongoing news thread of stories whose general shape is "societies lovingly tie the nooses with which they will eventually hang themselves". www.nytimes.com/2026/10/01/w...
nytimes.com
Japan Raises Residency Fees 2,000 Percent Amid ‘Anxiety’ Over Foreigners
Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi is making it harder for immigrants to stay in the country. Critics say she is hurting Japan’s ability to address labor shortages.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/09/2026
"There is some point at which we have spent SO much money on AI that it finally results in productivity gains that make it all worth it" is the new Laffer Curve.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
The only reason many of those massive Imperial Roman arches are still standing in Rome was that the medieval aristocratic families found them more useful as keeps and guard towers to build their family defensive fortifications around, rather than quarries to cut up for stone. So, tbh, kinda classic!
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
Obligatory "Jamiegar McKelvigon" joke goes here.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 20/09/2026
In utter fucking dork news, a company named after the dragon's mountain in THE HOBBIT was ripped off in a clever arbitrage run by a company named after the rogue AI in NEUROMANCER. www.theinformation.com/articles/ere...
theinformation.com
How Erebor Bank’s Sweet Stablecoin Deal Backfired
When Palmer Luckey’s Erebor Bank launched earlier this year, it made an attractive pitch to lure new crypto customers: It would convert their stablecoins to cash for free. But Erebor wound up pulling ...
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
"I happen to know some fifth-graders, and statistically it is likely that one or two of them will grow up to be terrific investment bankers, but I would never want to guess which ones."
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Ten years ago we had Steve Kennedycenter, Johnny Reflectingpool, and Bob Eastwing but now… www.npr.org/2026/09/17/n...
npr.org
Trump threatens to tear down the Kennedy Center, as legal battle continues
The president made the remark to reporters amidst back-and-forth developments in federal court, including an allegation that a forklift repeatedly struck the center.
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Alejandro Arbona 🇵🇷 @alejandrobot.com · 17/09/2026
I practically went RUNNING to grab mine from the shelf and check
My hand holding the accordioned-up baby cart schematic, and the box with the open spine in the background
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
"What if we create super-intelligences that out-think us, outlive us, take control of all our resources, and decide to enslave us?" You fucking dummies, we've already done that, they're called corporations.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
When he puts it that way, it sounds like the President was re-elected specifically as a Communist accelerationist plot to ensure their viability starting more or less now. Did this bozo just give the game away?
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Matt Levine @matt-levine.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
This newsletter has an incredible business model that is unfortunately very misunderstood. www.bloomberg.com/opinion/news...
bloomberg.com
AI Labs Want Someone to Stop Them
AI and antitrust, lockups and indexes, annuities, Montessori and sudden wealth syndrome.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 13/09/2026
Gonna be a crazy day in our parsley bed, looks like.
Photo of six small male praying mantises clinging to the back of a much, much larger female praying mantis, who is herself hanging on the side of a long stalk of parsley.Sankey Diagram in which six separate "eager" males are inputs to a central "Female Mantis", after which there are six separate "head removed" outputs.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Tsk, there goes the neighborhood. www.ft.com/content/32aa...
ft.com
City of London set to drop century-old rule against logos on buildings
Square Mile’s governing body considers allowing companies to display their logos on the top of offices for the first time
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
"It is not the first time Huang has said AGI has arrived." lol www.businessinsider.com/nvidia-jense...
businessinsider.com
Nvidia's Jensen Huang says 'AGI has arrived' and congratulates OpenAI
Nvidia CEO Jensen Huang made the comment on Sunday, days after OpenAI released Astra, its newest and most powerful AI model.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Probably gonna be a mixed bag when this bubble finally pops.
"Shareholder value" meme as the adult in the shreds of his old business suit tells the young ones at the camper "But at least we're not asking some fucking chatbot how to grill this dog".
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Apparently SCOTUS has decided the President can turn the White House into a gold-plated toilet paid for by corporate welfare buskers.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
K-Shaped Recovery would be a great name for a really angry punk band.
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zaratustra @zaratustra.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Also, he meets his new girlfriend during a standardized test.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Some kids skip school.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
A desert farmboy does his chores instead of going into town with his friends.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
An aging admiral’s chance encounter with a long-forgotten professional acquaintance also reunites him with his adult son.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
An ex-cop has to find some servants that ran away from their job.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
Grandpa's not gonna like that. Someone's gonna get a whippin'. www.cnbc.com/2026/08/28/k...
cnbc.com
Analysis: Kevin Warsh sharpens inflation warning at Jackson Hole, signaling possible rate hike
After confusing markets at his July press conference, Fed Chairman Kevin Warsh used Jackson Hole to give a clearer view of the case for higher interest rates.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
Every time I see "Woke 1.0" it makes me think we should just get all of Woke into a source control repository with branching and proper versioning and some unit tests. Then we can ask Claude to explain what it actually does and also to fix all its problems with no mistakes.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
Last I checked, the point of D-Day was to keep it absolutely secret until it was underway...? www.ft.com/content/cb86...
ft.com
Scott Bessent: an economic D-Day is coming for Iran
Countries that calculate appeasement of the regime to be a safer choice should reconsider
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Dave was a fellow Central Valley Air Force brat. I met him and @jhwilliams3.bsky.social around the same time, when they were just starting to figure it out, this whole making-comics thing. For thirty years, you were always about to read another comic he had just done.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Going out on a limb here to guess that literally nobody asked the obvious next question that should have instantly followed up.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Cannot wait to hate-watch this movie about the SCUBA guy being eaten by a sperm whale and surviving. Sixty minutes of air my ass, you’ll burn a thousand PSI just flailing around like that in the whale’s mouth.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Pretty sure Substack has replaced patriotism as the last refuge of a scoundrel these days.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
What's your favorite Bible verse? Wrong answers only.
Bruce Willis in PULP FICTION, sitting on Zed's chopper, saying "I'm sorry baby, I had to crash that Honda".
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Ken Plume @kenplume.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
Disney+ released a list of essential projects to watch before AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY: -CONDORMAN -THE BLACK HOLE -THAT DARN CAT -PETE’S DRAGON -SUPERDAD -THE CAT FROM OUTER SPACE -HERBIE GOES BANANAS -ESCAPE TO WITCH MOUNTAIN -DARBY O’GILL AND THE LITTLE PEOPLE -SON OF FLUBBER -THE GNOME-MOBILE
Image of Condorman from CONDORMAN
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mtsw @mtsw.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
cool we finally discovered what the military equivalent of bankrupting a casino is
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Bugs, Yaoist @bugsmaytrix.bsky.social · 06/05/2026
thunderstruck sounds like a song the gremlins from gremlins would make if you locked them in a Guitar Center
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Man if I were the reporter who struck this vein I would keep mining it until someone stopped me with force. “How long do you think they should stay out there without respite? Do you expect other armed forces to have equally long deployment? Say more.”
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Here, the ghost is me. @highway62.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Nikki from Obsession is a Disney Princess now. I don't make the rules.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
Current 20, as @highway62.bsky.social would say. Bit of real-life vaporwave at Eagle Beach, Aruba.
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Pixie Casey @pixiecasey.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
in insane local news, the 26 year old director of a rocky horror production was arrested for sending threatening messages to himself in order to get the play shut down bc he didn’t want to deal with cast drama www.mynbc5.com/article/rock...
mynbc5.com
VT musical director of planned 'Rocky Horror Picture Show' created fake threats, police say
The director of a planned production of "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" admitted to sending himself threatening texts that eventually got the play canceled out of safety concerns.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Imagine outing yourself as this much of a complete chump with this straight a face.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
A door that is very slightly ajar is technically open even if almost nothing can get through it.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
tfw you accidentally send your ChatGPT prompt to the group chat
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
The Rent Collector of the Rings: The Return of the Boss
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Under fire from who? Collectors? Five years ago collectors were excited by NFTs of paintings that were physically destroyed so that only the digital receipt remained.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Pouring one out for the handful of firms who literally just today started paying $100,000 per month for an automated API service to harvest this content earlier and faster than any human eyes can digest it.
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Starfire’s Deranged Neocon Foreign Policy Podcast @irhottakes.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Honestly, the Qataris should ask for their plane back. That was an honest bribe made in good faith and El Fucko didn’t hold up his end of the bargain.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 20/07/2026
No doubt the contractors who do this work will be as thoroughly vetted for competence as the Reflecting Pool blue paint people.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
Just stumbled across this problem that does not need solving in any way whatsoever. If prediction markets are able to destroy the commercial viability of reality TV, maybe they were worth it after all. variety.com/2026/tv/news...
variety.com
Kalshi and Polymarket Are Spoiling Reality TV Shows — and Studios Don’t Know What to Do About It
Fans were spoiled on the 'Survivor 50' winner because of stacked odds on Kalshi and Polymarket, and studios are struggling to find a solution.
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The Elder Dan @crisperthanthou.bsky.social · 18/07/2026
This kind of smart, sailable mixed-use interior sea is illegal to odyssey in most American maritime jurisdictions.
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