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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

"In this age of popularity contests, social media, lightning speed AI, and tech billionaires who wish to objectify and commodify us, we need skills and strategies to keep us balanced, so we can benefit from our inner wisdom and the collective wisdom our various wolf packs have to offer."

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Beyond the Wolf Pack by Chris Warren-Dickins, a psychotherapist in New Jersey

An insightful book to help you navigate group dynamics and your mental health. Written by therapist in Ridgewood, New Jersey, Chris Warren-Dickins, Beyond Your Wolf Pack is available 1 September 2026

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 28/09/2026

"You must take life the way it comes at you, and make the best of it. ... If you don't, you'll spend your whole existence wishing for a world that doesn't exist, instead of surviving the one that does." Yann Martel

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 19/09/2026

We need our wolf packs (groups) but we need to be securely attached to them (not anxiously nor avoidantly) 🐺

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

We need our wolf packs (groups) but we don’t want to become enmeshed in them.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

Neither the lone wolf or the maddening crowd, but a balance between internal and external input. Isn’t that the ideal?

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 18/09/2026

To follow the herd has always carried some measure of risk, but with the growth in technology, we are now, more than ever, at risk of following the herd off a very steep cliff.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

How to increase the chances of anxiety or depression: Keep pushing yourself to appease / fawn over the alpha of a group.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

The more you appease and fawn over an alpha of a group, the internal friction you develop. And this leads to more stress hormones such as cortisol and epinephrine.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

And on the subject of mental health (yours and that of your kids): Popularity often, inevitably, leads to burnout.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Technology has increased the power of the manipulative alpha. Remember you have an ability to think critically. Challenge those assumptions and biases.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 17/09/2026

Nowadays, people seem more afraid of becoming “unpopular” than being accused of unreliability.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

There is plenty of literature out there to advocate for more social contact. That is a given. But we don’t want to over-correct and lose touch with our inner wisdom. We need to balance the voices in our various wolf packs with our own voice.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

…and group dynamics (scapegoating, bullying, exclusionary tactics) are used by the power elite to keep us distracted from these facts.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

Just another day when I try to explain that the power elite (top 1% of wealth) are the cause of societal injustices that worsen our mental health (eg, wealth polarization, escalating food prices, and deteriorating living conditions)…

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

In both stories, they believed that this was an act of love and protection. As you can guess from the turkey come Thanksgiving, the rabbits realized that farmers don’t feed rabbits because they have want the rabbits to thrive! Thank you to my beautiful friend, Beth, for pointing that out!

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

I just heard that there is a similar version of Taleb’s Thanksgiving turkey in Watership Down (the tragic movie about wild rabbits). In Watership Down, the rabbits, like Taleb’s turkey, were fed, only they were fed by a farmer instead of a butcher.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

When they pressure their kids to follow the “popular” kid, but they don’t realize the mental health implications of deindividuation.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

When you realize that you were never alone, and there is a whole community who share your views of the manipulative alpha.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

To reach Beyond the Wolf Pack, to make choices that are beneficial to our mental health, we need to identify when we are being manipulated by an alpha of a group.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

And as for manipulation, just search “2021 Facebook files”: “Facebook (now Meta) was well aware of the harmful societal and psychological effects of its platforms but routinely prioritized profit over fixing them.”

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

To identify an alpha, look at who holds the most power; that makes tech companies the alphas of the societal wolf pack.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 16/09/2026

When they try to claim that “manipulative alphas” aren’t the problem… and yet tech companies deliberately target kids as young as 6 years old.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

They say that working through trauma is navel-gazing… and then they learn about epigenetics. Learn more in Beyond Your Confines and Beyond the Wolf Pack.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

The trouble is, safety is not our only need. We have a broad spectrum of needs, and when our needs are not met, our emotions tell us that things need to change. The beads of perspiration and incessant frustration were telling Mark that autonomy was not enough

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

…just to explain the story about “Taleb’s turkey” (and the parallel with an alpha of a group)…

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

When they think that pushing their kids into the “popular” cliques…but then they hear Taleb’s story about the turkey and the butcher…

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

When they claim to be a “team player” but their narcissism leaks all over the place.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

…and then you see how they behave without an audience. And the saxophones are getting louder.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

When we realize that extroversion was never the default norm for the United States (no matter how many times an HR training seminar tries to use “team spirit” as an excuse for exploitation…). As NeNe Leakes once said, “I said what I said.”

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Exciting news. The audiobook version of Beyond the Wolf Pack is available now! I hope you find it useful when it comes to navigating your place within each wolf pack of your life. a.co/d/0eXPAs3D

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

Depression / anxiety often follows where this leads: When we are surrounded by people who are not trustworthy, reliable, nor respectful.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

When they realize that popularity contests are more toxic than before because of the ever-invasive technology.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

When they realize that the least effective remedy for loneliness/isolation is superficial social contact. Quality, not quantity!

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

Sometimes we just need permission to listen to our inner wisdom and stop blindly following the herd.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 13/09/2026

When you realize that their absence cleared space for people who offer you trust, respect, and reliability.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

When they realize they can decline the invitation because their nervous system deserves better.

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

It isn’t about becoming a lone wolf, it is about finding a wolf pack of your kindred spirits (those who are trustworthy, and/or respect diversity of thought, for example).

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

Don’t be fooled by their performative altruism. How do they (mis)behave without an audience?

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

When they know that stress hormones are damaging to children who are forced to work, and yet they still make their child "work" at appeasing the "popular" (socially aggressive) kid. Make it make sense...

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

When they realize they can “grey rock” in response to a manipulative alpha. (Share less about you; less information and fewer emotions.)

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Chris Warren-Dickins, EMDR Therapist in Ridgewood, NJ and the UK @chriswarrendickins.bsky.social · 10/09/2026

You might find that these assertive phrases are more helpful: That sounds like something you’re going to have to sort out yourself. That sounds like a problem for you, not for me. That sounds like something that is causing you distress. I hope you find a way to resolve that. Etc etc

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