iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

So Newcastle had to sell Elliot Anderson for £35 million to comply with financial regulations but (via Nottingham Forest) Man City were allowed to spend up to £130 million to buy him in spite of being in breach of financial regulations (according to the independent panel). Hmm.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

"Before I give you the irrefutable evidence, could I ask you please to look into my eyes? Look into my eyes, the eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes, don't look around my eyes, look into my eyes..."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 30/09/2026

"And I have irrefutable evidence that sharks don't even exist."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Some consternation about the fact that Man City's main lawyer, Lord Pannick, charges £5,000 an hour. Even if he worked a 40 hour week he'd still be on less than the weekly wage of most of their first team players.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 26/09/2026

Those Man City sanctions in full: 1 Players to wear clown shoes for the rest of the season. 2 Gary Neville to be appointed Manager on a 10-year contract. 3 Donnarumma to swap places with the Club mascot. 4 'Blue Moon' to be replaced with 'Money for Nothing'. Or 'Little Lies'.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 22/09/2026

I'm in Gosport for work and have had a really stimulating day with some great people. However, walking through the town centre this evening, the atmosphere was somewhat tense. Reminded me of going to watch Shrewsbury play Chelsea or West Ham in the '80s.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 15/09/2026

Breaking: slow news day in Shropshire www.shropshirestar.com/news/telford/firefighters-called-to-greggs-after-person-becomes-trapped-in-toilet-9053292

shropshirestar.com

Firefighters called to Greggs after person becomes trapped in toilet

Emergency crews called to Telford Greggs after toilet lock fails

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 14/09/2026

BBC Headline: "Trump criticises AI boss who called for slowdown and says only guardrail needed is a 'smart president'." And where are we going to find one of those?

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 12/09/2026

"Hi Nigel, yes it's Michelle from Mone Polling Services."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 11/09/2026

25 years ago today my former neighbour Roy overslept, so wasn't at his desk when flight UA175 hit the South Tower of the WTC. On board was my hugely talented old schoolmate Graham. Two lads from Shrewsbury. What are the chances? RIP chap.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

"And then I said: 'Hey Paul, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better. Remember to let her into your heart, then you can start to make it better.' I think he wrote it down. I think he did."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

Some kid starting senior school is not news.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

"And then I took off my red bandana and gave it to some random guy."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 09/09/2026

"And I said to Neil Armstrong, I said, it's ok buddy, you go first. I just designed, built and flew the thing, I don't need the credit."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 08/09/2026

An ex- Reform Councillor who lost his seat on Northumberland CC after not turning up to a single meeting for 6 months is standing in the by-election he triggered. But he was said to have contributed online comments that he wanted to shoot Keir Starmer. www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/ckgwdell598o

bbc.co.uk

Northumberland councillor to stand in by-election he triggered

John Allen is standing as an Independent after losing the seat for not going to council meetings.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 06/09/2026

I've just seen a group of army cadets in their camouflage gear. Wearing high viz tabards. That could confuse a stupid person.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

If you can't be good, be lucky. We are neither #salop

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Another quality* delivery from Sang #salop *poor

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

Shrewsbury didn't get a single penalty in the league last season and if they're not getting one for that challenge, I can see us repeating that feat this season. #salop

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 05/09/2026

A great opportunity for Davison and a really poor effort. I wonder how many times I'll be saying that this season? #salop

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 04/09/2026

Reform will do what Reform does. They will respond angrily as if the victims, pretend they are addressing the matter, ride out the storm, then invent a crisis to which ‘only they have the answer’ and any dip in their polling will be regained. And I very much hope I’m wrong.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 01/09/2026

Vicky Pattison will cycle, run & kayak from Newcastle to London for the 'Make Some Noise' charity. Now I'm not upset that I followed a 600+ mile route and did it all on foot in 12 days to raise money for James Place. I'm just sad that you never got to see me in a similar outfit.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 29/08/2026

Having watched 3 of Shrewsbury's first 4 games this season on telly, I thought it was about time I pitched up to an actual game. Ordinarily, I'd be excited. But, as I said, I've seen them on the telly 3 times... #salop

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 28/08/2026

I’ve decided to rename ‘Donald J Trump’ ‘Fat Orange Paedo Rapey Corrupt Lying Buffoon’.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 27/08/2026

Amongst the emails I've received this morning is one inviting me to join the Royal Marines and another from a company offering me a funeral plan. At first I thought that was somewhat mixed messaging. But on reflection...

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 24/08/2026

So much joy to be had from biting into a KitKat and finding that instead of chocolate covered wafer you've hit solid chocolate. It's often the small things.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 17/08/2026

Under a Reform Government, Nigel Farage should be forced to work 20 hours a week in Clacton.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

"And I've been advised by the Police that this is a sensational looking outfit."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

"And I've been advised by the Police not to pay any attention to the Parliamentary Standards Committee investigation."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 13/08/2026

1. That's rubbish. 2. Even your brother did better than that. 3. Were you not paying attention? 4. Don't go blaming your dyslexia. 5. Well what are you going to do now? 6. What will I tell your grandma? 7. We're getting divorced. 8. I'm not your real dad. www.bbc.co.uk/bitesize/articles/zghqh4j

bbc.co.uk

Things not to say to your child on Results Day 2026 - BBC Bitesize

GCSE and Nationals Results Day can be a stressful and anxious time for our teens and young people - what can parents say to their child to help them cope?

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

"We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender. But if you want me, I'll be hiding in the catering truck."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

I'm being asked to believe that Brooke Norton-Cuffy is an English right back who plays for Genoa, when it should be absolutely apparent that he's one of the regulars at the Drones Club and engaged to a cousin of Gussie Fink-Nottle.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 12/08/2026

"Helloo! When do I do the 'fight, fight, fight' thing?"

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 11/08/2026

I was convinced Infantino had to go, but now that Trump has said that would be a terrible mistake, I’ve completely changed my mind.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

"Well I know, but if they get in, it might stop me being deported."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

I am not a white Briton. Apparently. Along with 9 of England's starting 11 in the Men's World Cup Semi-Final against Argentina. See also cricket and rugby union. Oh and business. And the NHS. And education. And much more besides.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 07/08/2026

It was not a power outage; it was a power cut. Thank you.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

Very best of luck to @bevcraig today. I'm sure she'll make an excellent Mayor of Greater Manchester.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 30/07/2026

"I'm really sorry to hear about that. No problem, we'll refund your entry fee in line with our refunds policy." *waits* *Looks up their refund policy* "We don't do refunds." He could have just said...

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

Farage having a strop about not being invited to discuss social care provision, is like Harold Shipman giving out for being excluded from a debate on GP home visits.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 25/07/2026

Billy Billingham: "I was in the Special Air Service, deployed on direct action behind enemy lines." Jason Fox: "I was in the Special Boat Service, undertaking offensive amphibious actions." Andrew Tate: "I was in the Special Housing Unit, installing replacement windows."

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 22/07/2026

I feel great today. Why do we even need the NHS?

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 20/07/2026

It's time for orange makeup It's time to dress like shite It's time they both departed From the most terrible tasteful, lacking in graceful, all-time wasteful, simply disgraceful This is what we call The Muppet Show!

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

Quansah and Chalobah must be gutted.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

I'm just surprised he didn't bring on Henderson and Trafford.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

I don't suppose there's any chance that Argentina sent an intern to spy on England training?

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

As a side note, ‘they gave it their all’ is not mitigation; it’s a minimum requirement.

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Keith Burge @carryonkeith.bsky.social · 16/07/2026

I have watched a million games of football. That was, quite possibly, the least enjoyable. Although on further consideration I’ll probably remember about a dozen Shrewsbury games.

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