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Medic

@burntlesbian.bsky.social
60 followers 64 following 596 posts
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Why don't people tell jokes to humpty dumpty anymore? cuz he might crack up
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 10/09/2026
I would consider my bed underappreciated, It's the most slept-on object in my room
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
What happens when orcs smoke pipe-weed? they become Uruk-high
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Dreams are sometimes connected. why? cuz of sandman's little brother, ampersandman
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 06/09/2026
Why do lizards love massometers? cuz it scales
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 05/09/2026
Whats another name for your funny bone? the humerus
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 04/09/2026
What do skeletons use to make a call? they use a tele-bone
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 03/09/2026
Whats a tree you should always have on hand? a palm tree
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 02/09/2026
just went to an emotional wedding, even the cake was in tiers
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 01/09/2026
Why is diarrhea hereditary? It runs in your genes
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Why did the football team go to the bank? they had to get their quarterback
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Why did the detective bring a pencil to the crime scene? cuz he needed to draw a conclusion
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
whats a cat's favorite color? purrple
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 28/08/2026
What does a house wear? address
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 27/08/2026
Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 ate 9
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 26/08/2026
How do trees access the internet? they log in
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 25/08/2026
What do you call a skeleton that's not moving? A skeletoff
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 24/08/2026
What did the pirate say at his 80th birthday party? aye matey
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
A soldier whacked Dwight Eisenhower on the head once, Eisenhower grabbed the soldier's shoulder and said "Son," he said "Do you know who you just pissed off?" the soldier looks at him straight in the eyes and said "Yeah, do you know who I am!?" Eisenhower said "No." the soldier, he says "Thank god!"
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 20/08/2026
why did the mushroom go to the party? cuz he was a fungi
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Why did the scarecrow win an award? because he was outstanding in his field
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 18/08/2026
There was an explosion at the cheese factory, I saw so much de-Brie
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 17/08/2026
Why don't oysters donate to charity? because they're shellfish
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
the bird flu? yeah, they usually do
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 15/08/2026
Whats a skeletons favorite instrument? a trombone
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Why can't your head be 12 inches long? because then it would be a foot
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 13/08/2026
I'm scared for my calendar, its days are numbered
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 12/08/2026
Why don't skeletons fight back? cuz they don't have the guts
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 11/08/2026
Why did the bicycle fall over? because it was two tired
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 10/08/2026
How do rainclouds travel around? they take the nimbus
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 09/08/2026
How does a penguin build its house? igloos it together
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 08/08/2026
Why did the crow sit on the telephone wire? It wanted to make a long-distance cawl
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 07/08/2026
What's a computer’s favorite snack? Microchips
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 06/08/2026
Why are ghosts bad liars? cuz you can see right through them
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 05/08/2026
Its weird to keep fishes in tanks, how are they gonna drive it?
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 04/08/2026
Where did people go to before the post office was invented? the pre office
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 03/08/2026
I sleep with a ruler under my pillow, how else am I supposed to know how long I've slept
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 02/08/2026
Whats Spider-man's favorite file format? .webm
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 01/08/2026
Why is it unadvised to collect honey without a bee suit? the problem's are-bee-sting
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 30/07/2026
why is gravel classified as rough? because its a matter of coarse
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 29/07/2026
God created trees by counting from one
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 28/07/2026
Cars greet each other in what way? the hi way
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 27/07/2026
how do witches communicate? by sending hex messages
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 26/07/2026
When rats, possums and bugs get together its called a pestival
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 25/07/2026
I walk into a bar ow dangit
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 24/07/2026
Whats an awful thing to say to someone you know? awawawawawaw
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 23/07/2026
I'm so dumb I thought Superman was an airplane
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Medic @burntlesbian.bsky.social · 22/07/2026
Theres one good thing about living in a submarine, every window has an ocean-view
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