Sign in

Boy shallot

@boyshallot.bsky.social
45 followers 29 following 1.5K posts

Telling the world it

PostsRepliesMedia
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 20h
Her Face Is Really Pretty But Her Beans...
061
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 02/10/2026
Out here bjorking my shit!
100
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
Boy shallot wisdom of the day: if u spend ur life eatin a big Kit Kat, don't be suprized when u get ate by a big cat #lion
031
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 01/10/2026
going to sleep tonight with a proud smile thinking about if they made letterboxd for Wives
031
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
House got toilet papered. Yep, you guessed it, on fucking Mischief Night.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 23/09/2026
Why don't they make a pizza that fucks you
141
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 22/09/2026
Let it be known that the Boyshallot brand stands firmly against death and rape
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 19/09/2026
Bilk Splongus reacts to Chag Imbrosia | Bilk Splongus Reacts
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
New evidence has been found implicating Yankee Candle's Fragrance AI in the slaying of Charlie Kirk
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
Yankee Candle's Fragrance AI, unprompted: Rape and murder? Fine by me. Try our new "Cinnamon Sunday" scent—20% off at all retail locations.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 18/09/2026
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Imma fuck the shit out of that "Claude"
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Pop pop that's the sound of my glock. Bing bong that's also the sound of my glock. Ribbit ribbit is a third sound my glock can make. A fourth sound my glock can make is a bassy synth crescendo that invokes dread. This is to make it scarier when I shoot the fuck out of you.
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
I'm in the bathroom at work firing off massive loads... [Read more] of bluesky posts about jacking off in the bathroom at work
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
Hello it is me, your son. This is my gay kitty cat emo Japanese lover. We are gay
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 17/09/2026
If a boy's feet are bigger than his hands he got a big dong. If a boy looks at you after he tells a joke to a group it means he likes you. If a boy's eyes start twinkling at you it means you are about to be pregnant.
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
When the ignorant white character thinks a foreigner's word for hello is their name and calls them that repeatedly >>>>
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
Bathroom w no loud fan makes shallot a self conscious boy
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 16/09/2026
My crazy head is full up with new ideas for drums and drum sounds the world has never seen!
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
how many paperclips to swallow for pick up by magnet ... what kind of paperclips do I need to swallow for magnet to pick me up ... how many paperclips should swallow before industrial magnet can lift person reddit
021
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
everyone wants to get up all in my fucking egg salad oh yeah well guess what it's COTTAGE CHEESE hahahaha yeah why's it green? Idk but it's your problem now
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
I straight up hate you and want you to die in a violent way
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
they should make artificial intelligence that can fuck your mom. It would really save me a lot of trouble.
120
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Never posting about penis ever again :(
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 15/09/2026
Im from yootland
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 14/09/2026
English speakers cooked with the word penis. That shit is gas bro PENIS
320
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 12/09/2026
Talentless 4th chair trombone farts in perfect F sharp, stuns high school band leader.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 11/09/2026
Can't help but feel like I'm forgetting something today...
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
(Fucks up typing and accidentally orders two dozen Doug Nuts) What the fuck is this
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 09/09/2026
Roswell alien was getting sucked off while driving the UFO that's why he crashed. They found alien jizz on the scene look it up.
030
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
Hope everybody had a quiet and reflective Labor Day. Hope you were able to richly imagine a life where work is meaningful and life outside of it is largely enjoyable. Hope you got your pee pee hard and tugged on it so as to make stuff come out. Love and peace yall
010
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
[about to give my son a life changing pep talk before the big game. huge moment for both of us. absolutely can't mess this up] Hey chanp
011
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 08/09/2026
extremely embarrassing to be in a youtube thumbnail. Stop making that face and get a construction job.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 07/09/2026
I'm doing guest lectures at conservative universities trying to bring back the phrase "Check it!" like when showing your friend something
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 31/08/2026
Music challenge! Eat a whole spoonful of music and try not to cough!
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Just parked my horse and buggy up at Sheetz. Gonna grab a 12 foot hotdog to bring back to my Amish commune & show em the true power of technology
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 30/08/2026
Heartwarming: Thanks to Artificial Intelligence, this impoverished lesbian woman of color was able to have a t shirt with specific details about her life on it for only 15 dollars.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Hashtag Get Sauced Here
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 29/08/2026
Cockroach scuttling through front door, little satchel sloughs off its shoulder. Kisses the wife. Grabs a beer from the fridge—a Bug Lite. Ahhh... the weekend
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
This Parmesan cheese got me punchin
021
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
"Everybody Kind Of Just Figuring It Out And Doing There Best" —boyshallot life philosphy worldview 2026
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 23/08/2026
I could spend hours in the canned fish aisle
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
ordered a fleshlight off temu & it's just an opaque black box. can't see into the hole at all. Its making knife sounds
120
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Me and seven of my best boys all wearing hollister sweatshirts and 6inch pastel color inseam corduroy shorts and sipping on nonalcoholic IPA's and smoking lavender bloom out of dollar bills
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 22/08/2026
Hanukkah is like microdosing Christmas
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 21/08/2026
Hey dude sorry to bother you but my locust got out and now i cant find it. Yeah my locust. Last I saw it it was like touching all your blankets and linens.
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 19/08/2026
Lowkey forgot the Alamo lol. Straight up do not recall what that is.
121
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 16/08/2026
I'm putting my booty on your mom
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
Sorry I blacked out for 20 minutes thinking about swipe to text
020
Boy shallot @boyshallot.bsky.social · 14/08/2026
There's probably Bitmoji porn
121