iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 03/04/2025

If you can’t handle me at my worst then man hook hand car door

Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 27/03/2025

See my swimming pool brother. With twelve thousand hotdogs brother. They’re breathing brother. Thousands of tiny mouths. They’re hungry brother. But the water is fine.

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 25/03/2025

I’m considering dunking my body in frosting to understand the plight of the doughnut

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 13/03/2025

Six bald blokes in england shirts scrumming in a giant fondue fountain of Bacardi pre mixed cocktail yelling “you want some” in unison

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 03/03/2025

Carry On movies should have a comeback. We could have Carry On Poggers. Kenneth Williams on a twitch stream making bawdy jokes about master chief. Hmm?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 02/03/2025

Anyone Billy Joel look like a creepypasta? Jeff the Killer's dad? 🤔

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 01/03/2025

Garlic bread but for dogs. That is it.

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 23/02/2025

I propose a conversion program to get foreigners accustomed to salt and vinegar on chips called the ketchup-vinegar quotient. First, mix the subject’s ketchup with a trace of HP sauce, gradually changing the ratio until they are Brown-pilled. Then slowly dilute the brown sauce with vinegar et vióla!

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 22/02/2025

Just two more months of work before I have enough to pay the guy who sleeps in the alley behind my work to graft a Nokia 7610 Supermova to my wrist!!

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 14/02/2025

Why are we all still bothering to post when this has been in the world for over 15 years?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 13/02/2025

This valentines throw a thought to the Duolingo owl who doesn’t understand how to be in a relationship without making it transactional and messes it up every year. Duo you don’t have to give people expensive jewellery every time you do it!

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

It just feels like a really good time to bring this oldie back

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 09/02/2025

Lots of sad and scary shit happening out there so I’m considering buying a lot of Iraqi Dinar

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 08/02/2025

“Magic (Mike) The Gathering”: Anyone got any idea what I could do with this?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

Building god on my computer so I can ask it if I’m allowed to jonk it on the regular

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

Aw man I’m so full and bloated with all this content I’ve been consuming

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 04/02/2025

I miss Going on the Computer now we just consume content I’m full

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 03/02/2025

Tweeting the word “arse” is Oral Histories

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 03/02/2025

“Bean” is in the top 20 funny words

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 01/02/2025

The kazoo is one of man’s most dangerous military tools, able to mobilise any one individual to extreme violence (towards the kazoo player)

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

Anyone considered bringing noun capitalisation into the English language like they have in German? Then we can say Cock, Pussy and Arse, regardless of their placement in the sentence 🧐

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 31/01/2025

The best bit about being on Universal Credit is when you’re forced to come into the job centre to watch the World Champion Slow Typer take 15 minutes fill a form for you that you already did in about 2

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 30/01/2025

This board game box has the purest vibes

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

My new set list is: Left speaker, five minutes Right speaker, five minutes Slapping my belly, 15 minutes Subwoofer, 10 minutes Gargling mouthwash, 3 minutes Just really staring you down kinda freaky style, 20 seconds Wonderwall, until curfew

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

Cold take: there’s a hypocrisy in how western Capitalists always love competition until another country brings out a better product.

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

I preferred “Have you dreamed this man?”

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 28/01/2025

About to teach my friends the rules to a German board game called “Cock is best!”. It’s a mid-weight engine builder with card drafting and beautiful wooden pieces. You have to allocate cubes to build girth and length, and at the end of the game you score the LOWEST of the two to win Sperm Points.

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 25/01/2025

I imagine Dr Dre in Acton and I feel calm

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 25/01/2025

I get FOMO so bad, when I listen to gangsta rap and they say west side I pretend they are talking about West London so I fee involved

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 24/01/2025

Sometimes it's hard to find joy in the world but then i think of a mouse wearing a mushroom as a hat and I fall even deeper into the abyss

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

I change my phone keyboard to Spanish when I’m on the dating apps to make myself a bit more mysterious

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 20/01/2025

Im currently tattooing this dog I found waiting outside a door in my block of flats with the words “worthy of more respect than Donald Trump” and I am excited to see what sort of political discussion this sparks

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 20/01/2025

Eliane Radigue in the streets, Lil B in the sheets

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 18/01/2025

I love working retail. I love working on the till. I love filling the money drawer up. What a filthy little guy. I love a tuffing him with coins and assorted notes until he’s sooooo bloaaated and fulllll

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 17/01/2025

No worse abuse than being followed and unfollowed a few days later

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 17/01/2025

Going door to door offering my jar-opening services, gaining the respect of the men and the admiration of the women and children

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 16/01/2025

I woke up in a sweat. I’d dreamt I posted something that wasn’t funny. People had responded “that’s not funny”. I lay in the cold twilight and watched the sun rise outside my window on another bleak day

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 14/01/2025

You never see animated protagonists get lifted by the seat of their pants anymore. Woke America?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 12/01/2025

Don’t eat meat unless you’re willing to kill the waiter

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 11/01/2025

Can someone make a fruit ninja but for aggressively flirting with people in coffee shops who can’t escape talking to me because they are paid to be there?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 10/01/2025

Dressing as a frog. Piccadilly Circus. Eating flies. And shoplifting Hersheys from the American candy shops. Mindfulness.

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

at clown shows you have to assert dominance. Every time the clown sprays you with water, pour hot coffee on them. When the clown is sad, remark loudly to your wife that you really didn’t like how the Sopranos ended, Tony should have driven into the sunset in a big red car and a couple babes fr fr

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

I’m gonna start doing pro wrestling and my schtick is gonna be head butting everyone who says wrestling is fake. Man I’m gonna get so many lawsuits

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 09/01/2025

I miss listening to music with people. I wanna hang out and just trade tunes

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

Can we bring back just saying swag at 5 second intervals?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

Logging onto the group job zoom interview on 6 computers in 6 different rooms and commando crawling the screens so I can jumpscare the Hiring Manager at the Croydon Quiznos

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 08/01/2025

Regarding the fit- Bruv Party x megamind collab?

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Billy Tweetman @billy-skyman.bsky.social · 07/01/2025

Listen kid, if you’re not eating Monopoly money and brushing your teeth with live rats, no way are you gonna be part of this gang. Which gang, you ask? The Monopoly-money-eating-rat-toothbrush-gang

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Reposted by Billy Tweetman

UMAW @umaw.bsky.social · 05/01/2025

Amazon may join Spotify in demonetizing artists on their platform. This is the exact opposite of “artist-centric” — it’s actively harmful to artists! Streaming services must be regulated and artists must be paid a fair wage. We need the Living Wage for Musicians Act now!

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