iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 14/02/2025

I know I've been a bit quiet. Moving chaos abounds. More on the other side.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 08/02/2025

I honestly thought I'd have used this more by now. Then again, being horribly sick restricts one's use of new things

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 02/02/2025

How can someone go from "You are All" to "You are Nothing" within days, when you did NOTHING wrong?

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 30/01/2025

I do not wish to die. I will, however, spend my last breath saving others from what the educated of us recognize as a deeply dark evil this nation and world has known before.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 30/01/2025

While I will not commit an act of violence except in the direct self-defense of myself or another, our fascist leaders are seen by me for who they are, and I oppose them in ever way I possibly can.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 30/01/2025

Dear NSA, Secret Service, and whoever else is paying attention.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 30/01/2025

Posted on FB; reposted here to my colleagues, followers, and other decent human beings. --- I've been reticent to re-engage with political vitriol on here, mostly for emotional self-care. Do NOT mistake that for complacency with the evil that is afoot.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 29/01/2025

Love. Life. Peace. Joy. Anyone who claims to be Good wants nothing more for another human being.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

So within a month or so, I'll be in Pittsburgh starting a new adventure. Sober, writing, gaming, and enjoying this next part of my life as much as possible. My eternal gratitude to all of you for your ongoing support.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

'll have desperately-needed access to health care again, and no longer be impoverished. (Not having rent or a new mortgage means the house sale will become a very solid nest egg for me.)

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

On the other side of this, I have an opportunity to live comfortably with a dear friend who has plenty of space for me in Pittsburgh, PA. I will be able to sell this house and the attendant property for a very nice sum (and quickly). I

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

There are too many not-good memories here, and not enough opportunity to enjoy company and what the area has to offer.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

...my van all-but-inoperable, leaving me isolated on this Mountain; an absolutely devastating heartbreak; and, of course, the current state of the States.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

It was anything but - terrible relapse; the painful crawl back from that; discovering Disability will take *much* longer than anticipated and being forced to beg for help just to stay afloat...

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

"Now it can be told." Many of you reading know I've been dealing with a LOT of trauma over the last couple of years. My move from CO to the family land on Signal Mountain, TN was supposed to be a "fresh start."

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 23/01/2025

Realtor coming today. New adventures ahead.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

#sobriety Awoke to rather intense anxiety today, worse than most days. The kind of anxiety that drove me to "day drink" before. Breathed. Listened to my audio book ("2034," as my current jam is WWIII political/military thrillers). Remembered wallowing in filth on the floor. Staying sober.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

Good night, Bluesky. It was a good first day.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

So every day, I want to drink to deal with the crises, stress, anxiety, and trauma of my own life; the lives of others I care about and cannot help; and the world at large. I have to talk myself out of it. Every. Single. Day.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

(Others around me - like Carinn - noticed and tried to get through to me, but I wasn't listening.) Ultimately, as I tried to work in a "normal field" as a technical writer, the stress and anxiety of never being sure I knew what to do or how to do it got me day-drinking every day.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

Of course, self-medication became a huge part of my drinking as my pain levels increased dramatically. When I got my hip replaced, they went down considerably; I kicked all the opioids I was on, but not the drinking... because I still didn't think I had a problem.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

For those who remember my "May First Incident" (related to the surge of accusations during the "Me Too Movement," that was the earliest time I remember drinking more to cope than to just have fun or manage pain.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

Escaping my anxiety, depression, and overall trauma. The chaos of my life grew worse and worse over time, and what was a "fun pastime" became a coping mechanism.

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 22/01/2025

One of the things I need to get back to talking about is my constant recovery from alcoholism. Someone asked me today - "What was your main motivation for drinking? Escape? Habit? Something else?" More in the comments -

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 21/01/2025

Can we please call this what it is? What I don't understand is how The Richest Man in the World (who considers himself so F-ing brilliant) could possibly think this was a "Good Idea?"

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Sean Patrick Fannon @bigirishspf.bsky.social · 21/01/2025

Hey all. Yep, I'm here now, finally. #resistance #rpgs #prowlers&paragons #furiousengine

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