Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 28/09/2026US intelligence must have an impressive spread to be tracking British fly tippers. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 23/09/2026Just to clarify, it’s your best mate that swiped the cup and not Prince Charles, right? 170
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 23/09/2026This suggests that maybe getting married was the worst thing you ever did 🤔 Court orders can apply to any asset, not just pensions. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 19/09/2026They had a bit of a boost during Farage’s pointless Clacton by-election stunt and topped a couple in August. 100
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 16/09/2026Translation: I shoplift. If they want me to stop shoplifting they need to hire more staff and put prices up to cover the employment costs. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 31/08/2026As if they do tours of Number 10 for the general public 🤔 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 15/08/2026This clip always bothers me for the reference to the Tokyo stock exchange opening in 40 mins. That would make it 11-20pm. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 15/08/2026It’s genius, and I envy anyone that hasn’t had the pleasure of watching it for the first time yet. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 15/08/2026You just happened to have a spare vaginal canal knocking around did you? 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 14/08/2026This is basically twisting a knot in your urethra and attempting to piss through it. I can’t imagine it’s doing your waterworks any good, if indeed it’s even possible to piss. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 13/08/2026Probably just another made-up fess, in this case by someone that isn’t even a runner. I’ve been running various distances since my 20s and can confirm that after a properly long run all you want to do is drink and eat calorie-dense food. The last thing on your mind is cracking one off! 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 13/08/2026Works the same way for men when they get themselves in shape. Additional factor if they’ve made a few quid as well. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 07/08/2026I think he’s saying he can’t leave before someone that was there when he went in as it would make it look like he can’t take the heat for very long. I think. 120
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 05/08/2026M&S have a much more stylish range these days - for menswear at least. They poached the head designer from Reiss a couple of years ago, and it shows. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 05/08/2026Subject and object, innit? Don’t get me started on people that say ‘…and I’ when it should be ‘…and me’. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 04/08/2026If you google ‘woman showers during funeral’ I doubt it’d be hard to find! 110
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 04/08/2026Could’ve been far worse. There was that now-infamous woman who watched a funeral on Zoom whilst showering and shaving her fanny unaware that her camera was on. 130
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 03/08/2026His short game is worse than mine. At least I tend to get the ball closer to the hole with each shot. Surprised his security allows people to stand where they were to film that, to be honest. 050
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 02/08/2026This is literally why the waiters come and ask ‘is everything ok?’ It’s not a dinner party where good etiquette takes precedence, and it’s perfectly acceptable to tell them your £30 steak is overcooked. 2100
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 02/08/2026Linkin Park’s breakout album was released 26 years ago and the band members all pushing 50. I don’t think getting the band name a little wrong affected your coolness, to be honest. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 02/08/2026I have seen entire walls erected like this (albeit wood-panelled). I was wondering from the original post whether it was all 4 walls and roof! 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 01/08/2026I’ve just searched for this thread as it does indeed sound like it’d be very funny to read the outrage on the Mumsnet forums. Doesn’t seem to exist 🤔 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 01/08/2026It won’t, but seeing Farage standing up on stage alongside 33 joke candidates will be amusing nonetheless. It’s going to take the returning officer about 10 mins to read the results 😂 120
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 31/07/2026Am I the only one perplexed as to why this has caused him to run ultra distances?? Surely that’s putting off his pre-shower routine by a few hours every run? 110
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/07/2026I remember being told on our school visit to our local fire station about 40 years ago that well-intended false alarms like this are more common than actual fires. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Far better to clench for a bit and do it on work time. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Fesser needs to learn what under warranty means before making stuff up. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/07/2026Process of making cider takes about 4-6 weeks. I think we can put this in the didn’t-happen file. 100
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 18/06/2026Love how he’s questioning whether or not the women is local 🙄 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 16/02/2026I hope the new Restore party takes off. We need a right-wing vote split. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 15/02/2026If it was permanent marker, a few squirts of aftershave or perfum gets it off easily (due to having high alcohol content). 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 13/02/2026I think even a single canvasser can get a feel of things from a few dozen door knocks. But yes, the candidates and leaders will have a really good idea of how things are looking well before polling day. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 13/02/2026It’ll likely be feedback from door-to-door canvassing (from all sides). 111
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 12/02/2026No reliable local polls but betting markets favour Greens. People wouldn’t be putting down their money without some sort of steer. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 12/02/2026Betfair exchange has Greens as big favourites. Obviously a lot of money backing them, and not much backing Labour. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 13/01/2026So 48% think that shooting someone dead for driving away was justified? 😲 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/11/2025Hmmm, all the self-scan checkouts I’ve ever used seem to be able detect the weight of an under-nourished gnat. 1110
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 30/11/2025You missed the best reason: you still get paid for those 5 mins of having a poo. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 29/11/2025Joke stolen from The Inbetweeners movie involving Jay’s dog, Benjie. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 22/11/2025That 3rd-umpire decision for the 7th wicket was an absolute joke as it was given not out on field. Amusing to see slo-mo of dozens of England fans clearly shouting FUCK OFF when given though. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 22/11/2025As if someone getting a new kitchen fitted isn’t going to get 2-3 quotes. 000
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 08/10/2025Must take your bin men hours to do their round if, rather than using the mechanical arm to tip the bin’s entire contents into the wagon in one go, they sort through the contents of each bin bag by hand. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 08/10/2025You cheating, or not, won’t affect the divorce settlement. This has been the case since 1973. May as well take the opportunity if you really think that’s her motivation. She could be shagging the local rugby team and it’d be the same end result financially for you. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 19/09/2025Due to it’s alcohol content, a liberal squirt of aftershave or perfume will magically dissolve permanent marker from a whiteboard (or other surfaces), with the bonus of leaving you with a lovely smelling whiteboard. 010
Ben Belcher @benbelcher.bsky.social · 16/09/2025There are definitely worse text messages to accidentally send to a work colleague! 050