Barek
@barek.bsky.social
241 followers 583 following 4.3K posts
28 He/him Dutch Unhinged and chaotic, like a moth at a rave FFXIV, Arknights, Umamusume, Warhammer, Yakuza, fighting games, Arknights Sword lover @BarekLongboe on twt 🚫AI🚫 Learning Japanese pfp by @/royalmylk.bsky.social
![[First of two screenshots of someone talking about grief, how you never truly get used to people dying, why that is a good thing and how grief comes in waves.]
Alright, here goes. I'm old. What that means is that I've survived (so far) and a lot of people I've known and loved did not. I've lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom, relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can't imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here's my two cents.
I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don't want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don't want it to "not matter". I don't want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can't see.
As for grief, you'll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you're drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it's some physical thing. Maybe it's a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it's a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:nzx2a75gmnbvuogn6pskyc4u/bafkreigxo5vnwdokkgk7v6jsngkoivdlq5utbccjwtaktjzro3iu2ry3by)
