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A J Eastman

@alisonjeastman.bsky.social
65 followers 74 following 130 posts

PhD, reproductive immunologist, infectious disease researcher- but wait there's more! Enthusiast of fine cinema, trash cinema, food, surf guitar, cover songs, and cats. I also make a lot of art, and sometimes that art has science in it. And maybe cats.

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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 08/10/2026
I just collected blood from mice via "cheek bleed" with a lancet. I've done a lot with lab mice. This one scarred me (and them, obviously). I'm never doing this again when I can buy a perfectly good chastity device and calmly restrain a mouse to nick its tail and collect a few drops of blood.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 21/09/2026
I’m watching The Omen II: Damien and a doctor is looking at an H&E stain of some of the antichrist’s … something or other …. under the microscope. I really wanted the neutrophil nuclei to be little 666s. They’re already weird lobules anyway, it’s not even that far out of the realm of possibility.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 12/12/2025
Had my morning made by @rosebroderick.bsky.social ‘s Matthew McConaughey reference-
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 01/12/2025
Everything IS tuberculosis! *head explodes*
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 29/11/2025
Impromptu American absurdism movie marathon: Zoolander From Beyond Smokey and the Bandit All amazing. Zero regrets. Night well spent. I usually go for Eastern European absurdism, especially Czech. But these were all so different and so insane and beautiful. And Letterboxd reviewers are, too.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 29/11/2025
Further entries on the list of things I learned on the Simpsons first: The La Brea tar pits Oliver Stone Deviled ham Tom Landry (and Tom Landry’s hat) The Cheers characters Ricketts Vassar Humvees
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 21/11/2025
A grad student just told me she "aspired to my level of zen" while troubleshooting a very complicated plate reader. I didn't have the heart to tell her that it's just applying learned helplessness in the right amounts and scenarios. #gradstudent #labrats #personalgrowth #zen
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 28/10/2025
I call the set “cats fucking with the fabric of reality”. It’s got the Mandlecat set, cats dancing on Koch curves, cats batting at the Julia set, and of course the Sierpiński cat-sket. #fractals #cats #collage #fuckingwiththefabricoftheuniverse
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 25/10/2025
Doing another print run of my favorite design I’ve made, an adaptation of the lab rat knitting a genome. It makes me so happy getting back into printing! #scienceart #sciart #labrats
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 19/10/2025
Another year, another Mandelbrot Set. Comrade Serge made a Taylor Series to go with it this year! It’s maths-y AND it looks like a little grumpus 😻 #mandlebrot #fractals #pumpkin #happyhalloween
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
I started a Tumblr so I can write absurd abstracts for my absurdist collage graph jokes. www.tumblr.com/experimentst...
tumblr.com
@experimentsthatneverhappened · Amazing Experiments that Never Happened
First I started making absurd graph collages. Then I started writing absurd abstracts for them. Because due to budget cuts, I can no longer afford to attend conferences.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
Nothing says “manly” like soap labeled specifically for men based on one of cinema’s greatest female protagonists fighting one of cinema’s greatest female monsters, and based on the premise that men, too, can get face-fucked, impregnated, live solely as incubators, and die violently giving birth.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
Did You Know- there’s an episode of Murder, She Wrote from 1985 where Jessica harbors, in Cabot Cove, two fugitives from the Russian ballet seeking asylum in the states. A KGB is murdered, and an Orson Welles lookalike plays a more senior KGB agent who is obviously a huge JB Fletcher fanboy.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 16/10/2025
“To demonstrate how effortlessly the “visionary disruptor” can be automated given their indistinguishable predictabilities.” I can’t decide if I love it. The concept is hilarious. When I wind up working for one, the spite that keeps me going enjoys that my labor won’t benefit an actual asshole.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 04/08/2025
Hey, you know what, Outlook mail? I'm well aware of the tone of the email I'm sending. My labeling of my samples between experiments over the years varied considerably and yes, I said "sorry this sucks" to my colleague. But you know what? It's on purpose. You don't know me. #AIcansuckit #tonepolice
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 11/07/2025
I can’t put my finger on why, but it’s hilarious to me that Clayton and I have tickets to see T2 at the movies tonight. In 2025. As a repertory screening.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 06/07/2025
Working on opening a side hustle- Budget Cuts Science-Art. This is what you can use your PhD and back issues of society journals for when funding becomes unstable. #scienceart #budgetcuts #collage
An XY plot where the X axis is “days after mind numbing challenge”, the Y axis is “OVARY(s)”, the two conditions are The Cars and Bananarama, and the title is “human organ intake”.An XY graph plotting three treatments over time (X axis). The Y-axis measures “tears from hand job”, and the treatments are types of flesh: “belly”, “palm”, and “hand”.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 05/07/2025
4th of July 2025 impromptu double feature: John Carpenter’s 1996 Escape from LA followed immediately by Paul Verhoeven’s 1997 Starship Troopers. I love how, in the 90s, everyone in the props departments just assumed that the next data storage format would just be smaller CDs. #fascistfututemovies
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Reposted by A J Eastman
The Onion @theonion.com · 02/07/2025
Researchers Train Mice To Choose Between Life-Saving Medications And Other Essentials theonion.com/researc...
Researchers Train Mice To Choose Between Life-Saving Medications And Other Essentials
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 02/07/2025
The joys of reading poorly-edited papers! I’ve highlighted the relevant sections for you:
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 16/06/2025
While this label is in no way informative, it *is* at least fun: #H+Estain #pathology #slides
A white rectangular plastic slide box labeled “SURG PATH LAB (OLD) H+Es: VARIOUS HUMAN TISSUES” in black sharpieDozens of histology slides set horizontally in two columns in a white slide box, one end has a red label with the sample number, the other end has a white label with nothing written, and the middle has unknown human tissue sections stained with the H+E stain (hematoxylin and eosin), which colors the sections magenta and purple.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
One of the consistent, mild irritations for the last few years has been the lack of science words in the NYT Spelling Bee game, and their choice of what animal names they recognize as words and what they don’t. IBEX is a word but not LINGCOD? That’s anti-cod right there. And a missed pangram. #NYT
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 12/06/2025
A friend of mine who tried halva for the first time described it as “edible kinetic sand” and now I can’t think of any other way to describe it. #halva #kineticsand
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Me, trying to make small talk while waiting for A/V issues to resolve at seminar- #awkward #manymachinesonix #dune
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Invitation to review on May 28th: you have until the 11th to submit your report. Email 1 June 2: your review report is expected soon. Email 2 June 6th: your review isn’t submitted yet. Email 3 June 11th: your review is overdue. If you want the review before the deadline, MOVE THE DEADLINE.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 11/06/2025
Done submitting grants for a few weeks. Catching up on my book projects. Plural. Had inspiration for a hard scifi body horror with accurate genetics and immunology. Premise: what if my teratoma had differentiated nervous tissue and we became a hive mind? Starting it off as a short story.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 31/05/2025
A continuation of my list of things I learned on The Simpsons first: -quince paste -Pablo Neruda -Regicide -Deviled Ham -Tom Landry (and his hat) -several Cheers characters -Rickets -Vassar college -Radio call signs that begin with W (I grew up on the west coast, with K call signs) #thesimpsons
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Reposted by A J Eastman
Carl T. Bergstrom @carlbergstrom.com · 30/05/2025
Honestly just impressed that this figure was published in 2022, 38 years after the launch of the Mac 128k.
Graph using the crosshatched graphics one used to see on the original Macintosh.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 29/05/2025
Me, with terrible headache, pleading with the electrolyte solution I make, which the humidity has partially solidified: “please. Please just be part of the solution.” *sobs in chemistry joke* #electrolytes
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 29/05/2025
A heads up in case this reaches other investigators: several PAs were canceled last week, and there was very little fanfare and no warning or explanation. One of them is the Katz R01 I was applying for. #NIH #Canceledgrants
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 28/05/2025
THE KATZ R01 PA THAT IVE SPENT TWO MONTHS STRAIGHT WORKING ON WAS JUST CANCELED. I GOT THE ENTIRE APPLICATION TO OSP, THEY ROUTED IT LAST WEEK. NOW ITS CANCELED I prepared an entire R01 from scratch and submitted it. and they pulled the funding announcement
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 26/05/2025
I did it! I finally used a reference to "humsters"- chimeric human-hamster embryos- in a grant proposal. Thank you, 1980s IVF research, for one of my favorite dead ends of human gestation! pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/6670443/ #oddities #hybrids #waitwhat
pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
Evaluation of human sperm fertility by interspecific (human spermatozoa-hamster oocytes) in vitro fertilization - PubMed
The fertilizing capacity of 1) Males with unproven fertility to be admitted to an IVF/RE programme; 2) Probably infertile subjects and of 3) Males with idiopathic infertility, has been evaluated using...
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 25/05/2025
“Let’s try to wind up in the same elder care facility” is the new “let’s be neighbors when we grow up and have kids the same age so they can be best friends, too.” #goals
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 24/05/2025
When my R01’s study section (PN) was first canceled, there was a gag on NIH communications, and my collaborator’s VA funding that was my backup funding until I got something funded was pulled and I thought my career was over, I googled “finding comfort in nihilism”. #nihilism #academia 1/
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
I don’t want power or influence. My dream is to take public transit to my laboratory where I study and help cure diseases and I get money to cover mortgage and food and have healthcare. apple.news/AHjSTYl-zTVa...
apple.news
Opinion | The Alienated ‘Knowledge Class’ Could Turn Violent — The Wall Street Journal
Societies that exile their intellectuals risk turning them into revolutionaries. It happened in the 1970s.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 23/05/2025
Found my favorite explanation of god today in Peter Watts’s Echopraxia. #echopraxia #hardscifi
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 22/05/2025
When we both lower our standards, my spouse and I can wear the same sized T-shirts which, let me tell you, saves a lot of money on band merch and novelty T-shirts. I finally designated the area of the closet where they go last night.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 21/05/2025
Our cat, Colossus, only drinks water out of human-style drinking vessels, never bowls or dishes. Here he is by his dedicated coffee table pint glass looking like Showa-era Godzilla. Bonus: perfect placement of my husband’s sassy cat mug. #mainecoon #cats #godzilla
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 21/05/2025
I’m trying not to make this book on the past, present, and future of reproduction and assisted reproduction technology just a parade of horrors, but… the historical source material is 100% a parade of horrors. Today’s case: from 1790-1805, a woman had a term fetus in her bladder.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
I thought I could beat the storm home from the lab, but alas. Perks to being junior faculty though- my office and lab are already half underground and don’t have any windows, so I can just keep on working through a tornado warning. My only window is this picture my mom took for me. #tornadowarning
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 20/05/2025
Attempts to induce labor from 1854: “Scanzoni’s method of breast irritation”, and Kiwisch’s douche. It’s time to brush up on my German from undergrad because almost everything I can find on Kiwisch is auf Deutsch and I *must* know what was in his douche. #pregnancy #questionableoldtimeymedicine
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 12/05/2025
As a reproductive immunologist and former contraception and STI researcher, I wholeheartedly support the band HEALTH for having their own condoms at their merch table. Also butt plugs, made of materials that will neither degrade nor get stuck and necessitate an ER visit. HEALTH indeed! 👏👏👏 #health
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
The email address for the Journal of Pregnancy and Child Health is @pregchild.org. Someone should have thought that through a little more.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 08/05/2025
Sometimes I work late in the lab just so I can start off conversations with “I was working in the lab late one night” and get The Monster Mash stuck in my companions’ heads.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 06/05/2025
My R01 finally got reviewed. Not discussed. Am most depressed. I turned my bathtub into the Pacific Ocean with cold water, kombu/seaweed from the international market, and sea salt. I’m drinking a west coast IPA and listening to indie rock from the Cascadia bio region. Gotta get back to my roots. /😭
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 29/04/2025
Many things can be said about the 1980 movie “Humanoids from the Deep,” but most importantly, I found my new favorite technobabble scene! Y’see, they treated frog eggs with DNA 5 to induce growth, there were salmon involved, and then a very creative pronunciation of coelacanth. The aristocrats!
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 25/04/2025
My colleagues "chat'n'bitch" text thread is very suspicious of the Taubenberger appointment. "This seems like a very good decision. Where's the catch? There has to be a catch."
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 19/04/2025
I salvaged these ring stand attachments from the trash pile of a lab getting cleaned out during grad school. Finally made my abomination! It looks a little like Crow and Tom Servo had a baby made of very thin parts.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 06/04/2025
Whatever tornado did or didn’t hit Bordeaux in north Nashville, Clayton and our big cat Colossus are fine, they were in the coat closet, and I bravely sheltered in a brewery in Louisville with a bunch of microbiologists after our American Society for Microbiology branch meeting yesterday and today.
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A J Eastman @alisonjeastman.bsky.social · 04/04/2025
Seen in the wild. Awwwwwwwwww WHAT’S IN THE BOOT?!?!
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