Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 13/04/2025Bananas after a 5 minute walk home from the shops 0100
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 20/03/2025Just put down a deposit for a bottle of olive oil 070
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 17/02/2025‼️‼️ Some personal news‼️ ‼️ A WeTransfer link I sent is about to expire 040
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 14/02/2025Roses are red, violets are blue, I really thought I’d learn more on this horticulture course 160
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 01/01/2025Slept funny and now I can’t move my neck fully on one side. Don’t think 2025 is gonna be for me actually roll on 2026 170
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 31/12/2024“2025 is gonna be my year!” Don’t be so selfish, you can’t just claim a whole year 010
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 16/12/2024I’m having visceral cravings for sticky toffee pudding. With a blob of vanilla ice cream on top. Proper vanilla, must have black specks in. If someone could drop me off a bowl that would be great. 340
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 15/12/2024I’m NOT feeling very CHRISTMASSY this is an EMERGENCY 110
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 12/12/2024Podcasts will be in the middle of the morose and sobering subject matter, and then cut to an ad break that’s like AT KFC WE MOTHERCLUCKIN LLLUUURRRVEE CHICKEN! 030
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 11/12/2024“Get well soon!” I’m fucking TRYING quit pressuring me 171
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 11/12/2024He’s making a list, he’s checking it twice, he’s got distracted, he’s looking at vintage Boucle armchairs on Facebook Marketplace 060
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 11/12/2024I can confidently say that this year has been completely and utterly shit 060
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 10/12/2024I love scrolling Instagram and seeing that one of my friends has liked the same unhinged video as me 030
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 09/12/2024‘Tis the season to get fucked off with these pricks again 190
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 06/12/2024Them: What are you thinking about? Me: How terrible that movie with Lindsay Lohan and James Franco looks in ‘The Holiday’ 120
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 05/12/2024I think we can all agree that this was the best thing that happened in 2024 1110
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 05/12/2024Been on heavy pencil for a commercial for three years now. Fingers crossed 🤞 050
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 04/12/2024I’d rather go to a toilet factory than go to Winter Wonderland 160
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 04/12/2024Spotify wrapped when you’ve got insomnia is like “you listened to 12 HOURS CONTINUOUS WHITE NOISE” 365 times this year which puts you in the top 0.000001% of listeners! 140
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 04/12/2024For Christmas this year I want everyone to fuck off 150
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 26/11/2024Me accepting my award for the powerful performance I delivered in “The Argument I Made Up In My Head Last Night” 1192
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 25/11/2024In hell every time you put a wash on there’s a crumpled up tissue in a pocket that covers every item of clothing in tissue snow 260
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 21/11/2024Remember the song ‘Mad World’ by Gary Jules? That was a fucking depressing Christmas no.1 wasn’t it 280
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 21/11/2024Is it too early for Christmas music? Really wanna crack on carols from Kings 490
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 20/11/2024Reading the news is like being repeatedly punched in the face 140
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 18/11/2024If I went on Masterchef I would hiss at Greg Wallace anytime he came near my table 2210
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 18/11/2024I’d say I spend 90% of my days muttering “fucks sake” under my breath 250
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 18/11/2024Those aging face filters that supposedly show what you’ll look like at 80. WHY? WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO SEE THAT? Fuck me I’m stressed enough as it is 050
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 17/11/2024Nothing like a long doom scroll on a Sunday night, really sets me up for the week ahead 1221
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 16/11/2024Never met anymore more passive agressive sounding than the Co Op self checkout machine 130
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 14/11/2024I love it when parks in London put up little “spot the wildlife” posters. Like come on, there’s no kingfishers here, just be honest and put a picture of a rat. 210
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 14/11/2024Introduce yourself with some jobs you have done apart from what you do now: 1. Food sampler (stood in Holland & Barrett with a tray of juice shots) 2. Bartender 4. Barista 5. Chef (ok I defrosted pizza bases in a cinema and made guac) 6. Flower presser 210
Alice Etches @aliceetches.bsky.social · 14/11/2024Turning over in bed so I can flip my thoughts and review them from a different angle 120
