iiinova — where your digital self keeps evolving

I've been struggling to articulate what bothers me about the current Toronto pizza scene, and the best I can come up with is the Ninja Turtles would never go to North Of Brooklyn Pizzeria

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 19/08/2026

I never cared about sports and then Toronto got a WNBA team.

020

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 14/08/2026

I'm out here just vibing (vibrating in anger)

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 01/08/2026

I don't think it's fair that in the UK the passenger has to drive the car

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 29/07/2026

"Vera" is a British crime drama about glottal stops

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

thanks for halving me said the magician's assistant

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 23/07/2026

luckily i was too dumb to be saddled with student debt

120

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 07/07/2026

The moon is such a cute little lime slice right now

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 20/06/2026

I'm so dangerously close to buying a four hundred dollar knife sharpener

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 11/06/2026

when a bus releases the air from its brakes it's like welp gotta drive now 😤

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 08/06/2026

"Nice person" comedians who work with homophobes I seeee youuuu

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 01/06/2026

If you're awake in Toronto right now, the clouds are incredible

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 31/05/2026

centaurs always look out for each other; that's the morse code

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 03/05/2026

I LOVE my trespasses being forgiven, but I HATE forgiving those who trespass against me!

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 02/05/2026

I don't know who needs to hear this, but I wasn't talking to you

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 02/05/2026

hamburger helper? I hardly know her helper

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 26/04/2026

me: i want you to know you're seen sean: it's pronounced "shawn" me: no it isn't

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 23/04/2026

comic who hasn't told a joke yet: you guys have a weird energy

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 11/04/2026

waiter a bottle of your smartest water

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 06/04/2026

There are at least eleven movies in my top five.

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 25/03/2026

i will die on this hill: mount slippy

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 24/03/2026

I admit 1993 was the worst year to release my song Whoompth, It's There

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 12/03/2026

comedians are like my family and comedy bar is like the overlook hotel

020

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 06/03/2026

me: fight the power also me: i eated too much :(

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 28/02/2026

I keep asking people ”did you hear about Kansas?" and they say no so if you didn't hear TRANS PEOPLE'S DRIVER'S LICENSES ARE SUDDENLY VOID meaning they CAN'T DRIVE, CAN'T VOTE, CAN'T LEAVE, AND ARE UNDOCUMENTED so they can be put in a concentration camps and if they drive they will go to prison

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 27/02/2026

fisherman's friend could be sugar free. i don't think aspartame is going to ruin the flavour

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

Carpenters: if you saw something, sand something

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 26/02/2026

If you see something, say something. If you see nothing, say nothing. If you see three things, say three things. If you see seven eighths of something, say seven eighths of something. It's that simple.

000

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 23/02/2026

it doesn't matter what gender your baby is as long as it is a punishment for the sin of lust

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 21/02/2026

I was shocked to find out there's another word for canning. It was jarring.

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 16/02/2026

”well THAT wasn't on my bingo card, but here we are" - me, constantly, at the bingo hall

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 15/02/2026

whenever people talk about MAHA I think of this

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 11/02/2026

I just want to say that there is no mention of Weird Al Yankovic in the Epstein files

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 06/02/2026

am i the only one brave enough to say beef shawarma wraps could use some queso

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 03/02/2026

My neighbours have begun some type of loud drilling into our shared wall at 8am and I have joyfully decided that that counts as permission to properly teach myself the drums.

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 30/01/2026

There's no point in going to comedy shows anymore. Comics want people to talk through the show so they can have content, and it's so distracting that the show sucks. Total waste of money.

010

Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 22/01/2026

Doctors are like "Congratulations on turning 50! Here's how to collect and mail your poo!"

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Alex J Squire @alexjsquire.bsky.social · 18/01/2026

food idea: pizza hut, but it's digestable

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