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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 19/01/2026

#GH fans now that Michael has a pretty face and a bubble butt: "He is a sweet angel who has never done anything wrong. He's been so kind to Chase and always had his best interests at heart. He never says anything hypocritical. Anyone who says differently is in league with Satan."

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 11/10/2025

Randomly thinking about when the last time Nikki Newman ate at McDonald's was. My first instinct was probably when Reagan was president when she was stripping, but then I remembered she's a drunk, so she probably had an Egg McMuffin and hashbrowns delivered to her last year. #YR

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 05/10/2025

I'm listening to The Devil Wears Prada musical cast recording and I'm not liking it so far. Elton should have called up Tim Rice to do the lyrics because they worked so well together on Aida. Hopefully this will be like Mean Girls where I can say a few songs are legit good.

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 28/08/2025

Stunt casting doesn't really work if the HW and EP isn't good at his job. #YR

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 02/07/2025

We are on the "Sonny brings death and destruction" writing right now, but I know in a month tops we'll be back to people kissing that man's ass for being nice to a guy with AIDS in 1995. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 25/06/2025

Topics in order: *Tyler Perry sued for sexual harassment *Rebecca Budig & Greg Rikaart hosting a soap podcast for CBS *Billy Flynn is the new Cane on #YR *Conner Floyd is the new Chad on #Days *A bit of #BeyondTheGates chat open.spotify.com/episode/7DN9...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 30 (#225): "The World Will Never Know"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 18/06/2025

Sasha: "I want to be a single mother and make chicken pot pies for my baby daddy's family while living with them and have no influence from him or them. That makes so much sense even he though he's probably to inherit this house. I'm smart!" #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 12/06/2025

I really hate how prudish Gen Z is. From wanting sex scenes to be abolished to think pieces about Sabrina Carpenter's tongue-in-cheek sexuality, y'all are annoying.

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 06/06/2025

Topics in order: *Sex appeal mattering in relation to #GH 's Rory Gibson and #BeyondTheGates Keith D. Robinson * BTG's Anita's secret and Hayley being a flop * #YR sucking ass *Luna going off the rails on #BoldandBeautiful *John dies and Bo wakes up on #Days open.spotify.com/episode/1BuN...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 29 (#224): "A Lovely Lover"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 06/06/2025

Soap actor leaving a soap: "So long, suckers! I'm going to be a star!" *anywhere from 6 months to 2 years later* "Can I have my job back? The rent is due." #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 03/06/2025

Having Rory Gibson playing Michael makes Willow look less crazy for cheating on Chase with him. The judge doesn't know that Michael used to look like a software engineer who only dates Asian women and uses 3 in 1 shampoo, conditioner and body wash. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 29/05/2025

Rory Gibson is doing a great job as Michael and he also has a nice butt which is equally important. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 28/05/2025

Sasha is a dummy for this whole scheme, so I don't feel sorry for her if she gets exposed on the stand. "I can't have my baby around the mob or raised in the Quartermaine family, but I'll go along with Jason being the fake daddy. That's the ticket!" #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 27/05/2025

Cody and Gio are proof that characters can come back from a botched introduction. Though soaps can do too much damage to fix. They shit the bed so hard with Natalia that there would be no forgiveness from the audience. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 20/05/2025

I really hope #GH uses this recast as an opportunity to really make Michael a leading man. The only time he really felt like a lead was 2015.

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 14/05/2025

Those pizzas must be so damn cold. Just sitting out while Martin gives a speech about family and priorities. #BeyondTheGates

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 14/05/2025

Topics in order: * #BeyondTheGates renewed and all the messy drama * #BoldandBeautiful is doing a location shoot *Denise Alexander's passing *Lot going on with #GH * #Days chat open.spotify.com/episode/2evz...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 28 (#223): "We're Live!"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 08/05/2025

Victor is so old a sneeze could throw his back out and he's trying to be the mayor of his granddaughter's cooter. #YR

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 05/05/2025

The title for this month's column: Does General Hospital Still Need Sonny? #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 05/05/2025

Peapack era Guiding Light had more stories going on and that had montages of people doing literally nothing as the shittiest song you've ever heard played. #YR

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 01/05/2025

Topics in order: *Abbott mansion remodel & Allison Lanier out at #YR *Fashion show on #BoldandBeautiful *Doug's story and the forthcoming party on #BeyondTheGates *60 Minutes/Paramount drama *#GH chat *Desperate Housewives reboot *Start of new HW tenure on #Days open.spotify.com/episode/1jfB...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 27 (#222): "Booty Shit Industries"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 30/04/2025

Okay, now that the 5th anniversary column is up I need to figure out what to do for May. I'm leaning towards making it a #GH focused column. It is too soon for another #BeyondTheGates column and I want to wait until Paula & Jeanne are deeper in their tenure to do #Days.

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 24/04/2025

Topics in order: *Martha Byrne's husband sentenced *Paula Cwikly and Jeanne Marie Ford's interview about #Days *Liam is dying on #BoldandBeautiful *Sidwell, Jason/Sasha and Sonny's health issues on #GH *Primetime TV deaths open.spotify.com/episode/2XME...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 26 (#221): "Hop on Pop"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 23/04/2025

They've been using the "We need Sonny to keep the bad mobsters out!" line for years. It is so tired. The man shot an FBI agent in the head last year and they still push the gummy bear mobster shit. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 16/04/2025

Topics in order: *Jack Wagner back at #BoldandBeautiful * #BeyondTheGates chat *The climax of Traci's story on #YR *Lots of #GH chat *Sami's return and Arianna recast on #Days *Wendy Williams' conservatorship open.spotify.com/episode/4KSV...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 25 (#220): "Begging Like Keith Sweat"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 15/04/2025

I have warmed up to Gio. I'm no longer rooting for him to fall into a sinkhole. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 11/04/2025

For the first time ever, we did a double top 5. We start with top 5 Best Guza stories and then we do top 5 worst Brad Bell stories. #GH #BoldCBS #BoldandBeautiful open.spotify.com/episode/6Jg6...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 24 (#219): "Top 5 Best of Bob Guza & Worst of Brad Bell"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 03/04/2025

Topics in order: *EP shakeup and Tamara Braun out at #Days *Lots of #BeyondTheGates chat *Mishael Morgan returning to #YR *The special episode of #BoldandBeautiful *Kim Delaney's arrest *The 62nd anniversary episode of #GH open.spotify.com/episode/6XIW...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 23 (#218): "It's Time for the Percolator"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 02/04/2025

Bill and Dani are 100% going to fuck this year. Hayley is going to find out the hard way that if they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you. #BeyondTheGates

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 02/04/2025

The biggest problem I have with the Kristina story is that she probably will face no consequences, and everyone will continue to coddle her. Like at most Molly will be mad for a week and then they'll have her apologize to Kristina for daring to be upset with her. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 31/03/2025

I hate Kristina so much. The last time I hated a soap character this much Babe was telling Bianca that Bess has two mommies on All My Children knowing that was Bianca's baby. #GH

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 31/03/2025

Defining yourself through other people is a common problem especially for women. Dani needs to find something that is just for her. #BeyondTheGates

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Reposted by Alan Sarapa

ThePopBreak.com @thepopbreak.bsky.social · 31/03/2025

@alansarapa.bsky.social's new column is here and he looks at why CBS' new soap Beyond the Gates is a hit.

thepopbreak.com

Alan's Soap Box: Beyond The Gates Is A Hit

Alan's Soap Box takes an in-depth look at CBS' new daytime soap -- Beyond the Gates.

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 27/03/2025

I could absolutely see Hayley making a play for Jacob eventually. Bill will cheat on her eventually and Jacob will be an attractive option given he's a good man and married like she likes them. That type gets wet over being "chosen" over another woman. #BeyondTheGates

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 27/03/2025

Topics in order: *The Ted recast on #BeyondTheGates *The Traci story and more #YR chat *Johnny finding out EJ r*ped Sami, the necklace story, etc on #Days open.spotify.com/episode/2dwz...

open.spotify.com

Season 8, Episode 22 (#217): "My 600 Pound Life"

The Chat · Episode

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Alan Sarapa @alansarapa.bsky.social · 20/03/2025

It is very normal for a soap to hire actors with soap experience. It only really becomes a problem if the character sucks and they insist on keeping them. #GH

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