Burn Before Reading @theredactedonion.bsky.social · 29/07/2026BREAKING: 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 1/5 Unc Bannon tried to glaze the X-Freeze group chat with a 40-minute monologuing voice note. Lost -2,000 Aura instantly when his vape pen blew out his cargo pants in 240p night vision. Absolute tragic status. 100
Burn Before Reading @theredactedonion.bsky.social · 29/07/20262/5 Posobiec immediately tried to mog the entire threat matrix by aggressively mewing into a front-facing lens. Zero jawline detected. High-cortisol levels surging in the War Room. Jack whispering: "Humanity status: COMPROMISED” and “COOKED” 100
